tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-47338093944316623982024-03-14T01:19:51.401-07:00Beans&CornfedA Marine Veteran, wife and mom- this sh!t gets crazyFrancesJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10608576780465350242noreply@blogger.comBlogger13125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4733809394431662398.post-91477530894627103412014-09-01T16:32:00.000-07:002014-09-03T19:52:57.924-07:00Back in the States yet not quite HomeSince my first Role Model Monday post I've been wanting to get on an actual blogging schedule, but since returning from Afghanistan I haven't been quite able to pin down an exact <strong><u>life</u></strong> schedule!<br>
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I was able to successfully and expediently check out of the command I deployed with and come back to my Marines back a my home station! However, my job field went through a pretty big re-organization while I was gone and about half the Marines in my shop were sent on a wild goose chase that landed most of them back where they started and never really had to leave from in the first place... I was supposed to be one of those Marines, but since I am getting out soon they decided to leave me be, which means no one knows where/who I belong to- think it sounds confusing? Try living it.<br>
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On top of that I had to rent a car for two and half weeks because the Sgt. had put a new cool air intake into the Jeep. This intake was so awesome it wasn't California "CARB Certified" and failed the visual SMOG inspection - if you're thinking LAME, just know I was thinking that except more like Fire Truck, minus the "ire Tr". So, I had to search around and find when and where I could get a new one that had a CARB sicker. Found it, shelled out the $300 for it, installed it with the help of an amazing friend (who I will continually show my appreciation for until the end of my days, but it still wouldn't be enough to show her how much she means to me) once we were done... no smog centers were open and neither were the vehicle registration offices on base. Good news, the smog centers would open at 8am the next day, bad news Vic. Reg. Office closed for the three-day weekend *whomp whomp!* Now I have a four-day weekend and can't really go anywhere without taking a chance of getting pulled over and having to explain to the officer "Yes, I know my registration is expired, but I've been gone for about a year and I have every intention of getting it done first thing on Tuesday sir."<br>
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So Tuesday it was back to the grind! Literally, because last Tuesday I had a wisdom tooth pulled and I've been sticking the softest food I can find, and since they gave me new meds my stomach couldn't handle it. I actually thought it would be a good idea to go lay out by the pool which was, but then I got super sunburnt because I didn't reapply sun screen - apply generously and often!<br>
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Though I am back and working I am not yet Home.<br>
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I have decided to put in my package for the Voluntary Enlisted Early Release Program - or VEERP. My current contract ends 15 May, 2015, but with the VEERP I am allowed to apply for a new end of contract date as early as a year prior. Since I was in Afghanistan at my one year left mark I am hoping to get approved to leave the Marines in November. Since I am putting in for that new time and it is so close I am holding off on taking any leave until I can start terminal leave on the Monster's birthday and be with him all day and not have to worry about going back to work. <div><br></div><div>I'm missing the Monster tremendously and some days I just want to buy a plane ticket and go get him already, but then I would have to come back to work and leave him with a babysitter which- he's had enough of not having mom. </div><div><br></div><div>Trying to get everything situated in order to start the rest of my life has been one thing after another but I'm getting through it. Hopefully by next week I will have some good news- wish me luck!!<br>
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-Frances<br>
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<br></div>FrancesJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10608576780465350242noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4733809394431662398.post-8814840248796468392014-09-01T08:00:00.000-07:002014-09-01T15:00:55.232-07:00Role Model Moday: Celena<div>
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We're back on track this week! Today's post would not be happening without my cousin Celena, she grew up with my sister and although I would love to give her more of an introduction I think most of you will be more than happy to jumping right in and learning more about this small business owner, mom and artist. So without further delay, I gladly present <a href="https://www.facebook.com/BabyDeeDesign" target="_blank"><strong><em>Celena of Baby Dee Designs</em></strong>.</a><br />
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<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><strong>What do you do?</strong> </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Currently I am a stay at home mom but also co-owner and artist for Baby Dee Designs. I hand make earrings, fascinators, hair pieces for that one of kind woman. </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">I am inspired by creative people, anything that inspires me as awesome. It could be a book, a show- sometimes we have shows at burlesque events that have specific themes. I usually make some items specifically for them which allows me to get creative within certain parameters. I have done sideshow freak shows, Star Trek, whatever. Also bands, like <a href="https://www.facebook.com/thechoptops" target="_blank">The Chop Tops,</a> who I made a bow inspired by their logo. I now have a deal with them and make their official hair accessory merchandise. They're an awesome band by the way, check em out!</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><strong>What gives you the drive to do what you do?</strong> </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">My drive is my kids, bills, lol, but as corny as it sounds making people feel beautiful; I really do consider my pieces a part of me and if I make someone happy by wearing it, it really makes me ecstatic. If someone wasn't satisfied with a piece then I am embarrassed and want to make it right. </span></div>
<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Sometimes women have ordered veils for their wedding day and that makes me so happy to be a part of their special day. It really does</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><strong>Do you have a set of core values you live by?</strong> </span><br />
<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">The core values of my life are: be yourself, be happy no matter the circumstances, and persevere through it all. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Life throws you curveballs, instead of stressing about what to do and letting it bring you down I think it's important to remember the most important things in your life and that's family and faith. When my dad was sick and made it through he told me after it was all done when life gives you problems with money, a job, or whatever. There are more important things going on, you have to enjoy life, sometimes you may thinks things are major but you "can't sweat the little things" life is too short. </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Ummm, just deal with it and move on. Try to stay focused on the end game and prioritize on how to get through it. And pray, I don't go to church as often as I used to, but I pray. I thank God for all the wonderful things he has done in my life because I am grateful and then ask for guidance and the strength to get through it. I know prayer works whatever god or inner spirituality you may have. Prayer works.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><strong>What have been life-changing moments for you?</strong> </span><br />
<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">My life changing moment for me was when I was laid off from an awful job where I was constantly reduced and marginalized. I worked in a male dominated industry and worked my tail off for nothing. Constantly trying to prove myself and in the end was laid off. That made me decide to not be the uneducated (don't get me wrong I know I am intelligent) young Latin woman who just knew how to answer phones. Nope that wasn't me. So I went back to school and majored in computer science and got my degree as a systems analyst. I still and working on the long game of achieving my bachelors degree but that's still in the works. Unfortunately I'm holding off on the bachelors degree because in today's weird employment market I'm not sure where exactly I want to go with my education. So I'm using my creativity and doing accessories in the meantime. Weird right?</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><strong>Who is one (or more) of your role models and why? </strong><br />
Role models...I think my parents are my role models with my current relationship. I look at them and realize no matter what goes on in your life you have to work at it and you will be happy. But it takes work and lots of lows. But with the lows are highs :-) life isn't easy, nothing about it is. <br />
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Also, there is a hair accessory lady named Nina Olivia "vintagebox 1947" she is a mom/ business woman and is amazing. I don't know her personally, but nowadays people FB everything.<br />
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I'm not going to go the Matthew McConaughey route and say I'm my own role model even though that <a href="http://youtu.be/wD2cVhC-63I" target="_blank">speech</a> was spectacular! Lol</span></div>
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<strong>If you could spread a message to the world, what would it be?</strong><br />
I would want people to know that I know miracles can happen. I don't know if it's actually God or what it is, but there are things that if you strongly I mean cry-your-eyes-out-on-your-hands-and-knees need to happen and really ask that it happen. You think about what you are asking and know and understand what you want and really, really, really want it. It will happen. <br />
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I don't know where this would fit but this is somewhat personal but I want people to know I can testify to really having something I wanted.<br />
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My dad was diagnosed with Stage 4 Oral cancer just before the holidays of 2008. He was <strong><em>so</em></strong> sick going through chemo, it was really hard to see him go through it. I remember one day he told me that when they were making him a mask to hold his head in place while he got radiation he was getting really claustrophobic, panicking actually. But he said "I just thought of my grandson and how happy he made me and it got me through it" now before my dad was sick I had been trying to get pregnant it just wasn't happening. So oh well that's it my kid is going to be an only child. But when my dad was diagnosed, I know this sounds selfish, but I thought "God if you allow me one more child I know it will help my dad get through this, let me give my dad one last grandbaby to make him happy and have something to give him hope to get through this." </div>
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It was probably the hardest most serious conversation I ever had with God I was driving home from school talking to myself, well, talking to God, and one week later, after about 5.5 years, I'm pregnant.</div>
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So I know and I want people to know prayer and faith works. It works. My dad told me after it all he thought of his grand babies and how he looked forward to meeting his grand daughter he got through it.</div>
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If you'd like to see more of or are interested in buying her hand crafted work, check out her online <a href="http://babydeedesigns.storenvy.com/" target="_blank">store</a>. And if you have questions about Celena's art you can always leave them here in the comments!<br />
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Thanks for stopping by on this Labor Day Monday, I know you could be out grilling or swimming or enjoying the last gasp of summer in any way you choose and you chose to stop by my humble little page and read this. Now go out, be positive and remember your role model or at least try to be one for someone else because Monday's suck, but they suck a lot less when you're awesome.<br />
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</span><br />FrancesJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10608576780465350242noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4733809394431662398.post-70657829611652650882014-08-07T21:31:00.001-07:002014-08-07T21:31:26.345-07:00Wednesday Words:<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: serif; line-height: 15px;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;">I hope you will all forgive me seeing as it is now my Friday morning and your Thursday night, and I am now just getting to post my Wednesday writing prompt. I am a few days away from ending this deployment and things have been busy trying to get everything set in order to leave the country.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I'm pretty excited about this one because I found a pin that took me over to </span><a href="http://www.appleblue.org/2012/06/101-blog-post-ideas.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Apple Blue</span></a><span style="font-family: inherit;"> who had a </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">huge list of post ideas and I was immediately drawn to one prompt because I have actually been thinking about these for a while now. Since I'm leaving Afghanistan and getting ready to transition out of the Marine Corps I figure it's time to not just dream about the life I will be living here soon, but legitimately set goals to build the life of my dreams. Plus, if I set my goals on here there will probably be some accountability. So without further explanation, I present 5 Goals (to actively work toward this year).</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"><strong><u>1- Compete in a fitness competition: bikini category</u></strong></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"> When the Monster was 6 months old I got a gym membership and a deal to work with a personal trainer. My trainer was so knowledgeable and encouraging she really opened my eyes to the fitness world and made me want to compete. Unfortunately when the Monster was just over a year old I ended up really sick and really out of shape and no longer had a trainer. I kept thinking about doing a competition, but I had no idea where to start and no idea where I would get the confidence to get on stage in just a bikini >.<</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times New Roman;">After I saw three friends on Facebook get up on stage I said to myself "I wish I could do that." Wellp, the wishin' stops and the workin' starts here! It has been 50/50 with the eating, having the chow hall cook everything is great but the selection of healthy eating is not. Working out is going well, but I get bored easily so if you have any ideas or have competed in a fitness competition leave a comment or email me I'm still a little clueless, but learning more every day... wish me luck!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"><strong><u>2. Learn Spanish - like for real this time.</u></strong></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times New Roman;">I am 100% Mexican third/second generation and I don't speak Spanish. I can pick out words here and there and I took a Spanish class in high school but nothing ever stuck. So when I get back I'm going to actually take a class and use it every day. I want the Monster to know Spanish, as well as really understand what culture he comes from, so if I learn Spanish I know he will have fun speaking another language and learning about our history.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"><strong><u>3. Become Self-employed.</u></strong></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times New Roman;">Transitioning out of a job I've had for 7 years is scary, but I'm also really excited about it because I would like to continue with Photography and a little writing (hence the blog) so why not be my own boss? Has anyone else decided self-employment was the way to go? If you have, especially in the photography realm I'd greatly appreciate any input! Even if you haven't but are thinking about it let me know, we can help each other during down times and share resources we've found with each other, besides who doesn't want a buddy or two to help along the way?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"><u><strong>4. Improve the blog.</strong></u></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times New Roman;">I know this sort of coincides with the previous goal, however I want to set this apart because I would like to own my own site. Blogger, you've been great but I really want to take this blog further. The first thing would be to stick to a schedule... oops. Once my photography work starts to resemble that of a portfolio, I would like to add a page dedicated to it. I'd like to improve my writing skills and increase the reach of the audience. I'm constantly on other blogs trying to see what ideas they have, and of course the <a href="http://www.sitsgirls.com/" target="_blank">SITS Girls</a> site is a great place to look for blogging resources. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"><strong><u>5. Be a better Mom.</u></strong></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times New Roman;">I saved this one for last because it is the most important goal I feel I have, the one that is closest to my heart and also the one that will be ongoing. I know through preschool I can probably homeschool the Monster so I want to make sure I'm there for every minute of it. Being away from him for this long has been the toughest thing I've had to do so far. He's grown so much since I've been gone and I can't wait to get back to him. I have actually submitted paperwork to leave the Marine Corps early. It was a hard decision to think about, but I know that the Corps did absolutely amazing without me for 230 years before I came in and it will do just fine for the many years of its existence after I'm gone, but my son will only be little for a while, he'll only grow up once. After dealing with a couple Marines who need their hand held to do things I know for a fact I would rather be raising my own son than someone else's kid (who is actually a grown man). I do love the Marine Corps and mostly all the Marines I've crossed and walked paths with, but I Love my son more, and he deserves to have me there for the rest of his life. Plus, I'm always on <a href="http://www.pinterest.com/beansncornfed/monster-future-monsters/" target="_blank">Pinterest</a> and I see all these awesome things to do that I know the Monster would lose his mind over having so much fun doing and learning different things.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times New Roman;">I know I have other things I want to improve and goals I want to set, but those are the top five things I want to work on this year. If you have any advice, or want to join me in smashing one of these goals, let's connect and be each other's accountability partners. Change is always an opportunity for improvement it doesn't always have to be scary.</span><br />
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</span><br />FrancesJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10608576780465350242noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4733809394431662398.post-32593441586117695822014-08-04T07:08:00.003-07:002014-08-04T07:08:34.138-07:00Role Model Monday: Maisha of Ahsiam Works<div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">Before the weekend kicked off, I re-posted some old writings having to do with being a role model for others. I would like to present to you </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">In this series I want to give you examples of people I look up to for many different reasons, but if you have any suggestions, please leave your role model's name in the comments and tell me why you look up to them.</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">I would like to start this series off with my sister, <i>Maisha</i>.</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">We are 13 years apart and only since I joined the Marine Corps have we actually begun a relationship or really being sisters. Though we have the same family, we grew up very, very differently. The way she carries herself with confidence and has a presence that doesn't rudely demand, but more commands respect is one of the reasons I look up to her. She has started her own business, creative as all hell and definitely one of the smartest people I know.</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">She has kindly agreed to answering a few questions. If there is something more you'd like to know leave it in the comments or check out her latest </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: black;">venture on</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: black;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: black;"><a href="https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100005238138176&fref=ts" target="_blank">Facebook</a>.</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><b>What is your Home town?</b></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">Monrovia CA</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Something you find unique about yourself:</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I'm left handed BUT, I hold my pen & paper like right handed people. Meaning: My paper, pen and hand aren't tweaked at weird angles when I write. Lol I think I'm the only left handed person I've ever seen write the way I do. </span></div>
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<b>What do you do?</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I'm a small business owner of Ahsiam Works LLC. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I'm a freelance multimedia artist</span></div>
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<li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Graphic design</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit;">T-shirt design</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Tattoo design </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Acrylic painting</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit;">3-D multimedia pieces</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit;">anything art I will create it</span></li>
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<b>Who or what inspires you?</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Everyday life</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">personal experiences</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">music</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">fashion</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">other artist's work</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">My imagination</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">My fiancé motivated me out of a very long 10 year funk.</span></div>
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<b>What gives you the drive to do what you do?</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Plain & simply put: Not wanting to be BROKE! Hahaha #TRUTH </span></div>
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<b>Do you have a set of core values? What are they? </b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">CORE VALUES:</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">honesty, loyalty, integrity, dedication</span></div>
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<b>Do you have a life motto or mantra you live by?</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">4 main mantras: </span></div>
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;">1. Speak the truth even if your voice shakes </span><br /><span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;">2. Tough times don't last but tough people do, screw your past, don't let it screw you.</span><br /><span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;">3. I'm at this stage in my life where if it doesn't </span><br /><span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"> a. Make me happy</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"> b. Make me better</span><br /><span style="font-family: inherit;"> c. Make me money... </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">I don't have time for it! </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">4. I refuse to be anything but successful! </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>How have/do you overcome obstacles that pop-up?</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">First I go absolutely insane inside my head! Then I take a few breaths try to relax. Then I make a plan of action or two or three. Then I execute the plans until one of them works out. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>What has been a life-changing moment for you?</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">A life changing moment would've been moving two thousand miles away from home at 24.</span></div>
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<b>Who is one (or more) of your role models and why?</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Honestly anyone I've known or know who is a "go getter" are my role models. I always admired people who were successful in life through their own hard work! </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>If you could spread a message to the world, what would it be?</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">"Get over yourself, be cool, be kind, don't be an asshole!" .... But then again what's the point!? We are doomed... This ship is almost SUNK! </span></div>
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<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-WPNw7TReTwA/U9-IT5chHnI/AAAAAAAAAfU/i4oCdYuG7ms/s1600/circa2009.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-WPNw7TReTwA/U9-IT5chHnI/AAAAAAAAAfU/i4oCdYuG7ms/s1600/circa2009.jpg" height="133" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">From left to write: Maisha, SheBear <br />(aka our mom) <br />and Beans before cornfed - circa 2009</td></tr>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #222222;">Every person in this series has shown me in one form or another that we each need to take it upon ourselves to be the person we want to be. No one else will become you <i>for </i>you.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #222222;">Do you have a role model you'd like to share? Leave the person and the reason in the comments.</span><br />
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FrancesJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10608576780465350242noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4733809394431662398.post-1321680840038173192014-08-01T10:33:00.001-07:002014-08-04T07:13:36.854-07:00Whether you think you can or you can'tThis is an old post, but this is something I have truly tried working on ever since I wrote it.<br />
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I came to the realization that I’m lazy.<br />
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I was watching some random YouTube video of this acoustic group, wishing I could play guitar, and then it dawned on me; I can. I have just chose not to. <br />
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I have had numerous people encourage me and push me to do great things and I feel I haven’t lived up to my potential. I’ve done a lot of shoulda coulda woulda and it ends now.<br />
I started to think about all my hopes for The Monster and the kind of man I want him to be and how I hope he chases his dreams with the tenacity, fervor and fearlessness of a honey badger (yeah I said it- look those guys up, fearless!) And if I want my son to be that kind of man then it is up to me to be that kind of role model for him. I will not just <em>tell</em> my son he can do anything and everything he wants and set his mind to, I will <em>show </em>my son he was born for greatness. I will show my son the satisfaction of hard work and accomplishment. I will show my son how amazing he is. Because it’s not just up to Dad’s to make their little boys into men.<br />
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The reason I chose to put this post backup is because it is something I felt I have worked on and think I've done fairly well. I've begun setting new goals for myself and working toward them with everything I've got. It also helps that the Sgt. is right here to back me up and keep me accountable to my new goals, hopes and dreams.<br />
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I also chose this because come Monday I'm going to start a new weekly post that I hope catches on. As most people would say Mondays suck, but I've realized while being deployed and working seven days a week - it is just another day and any day can be great if you let it. I want to bring positivity and encouragement to Mondays so if you're here I hope you'll come back after the weekend to see what I've got going for us.<br />
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<br />FrancesJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10608576780465350242noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4733809394431662398.post-69595077880717634492014-07-30T12:05:00.002-07:002014-08-07T21:38:57.879-07:00Wednesday Words: Summer Wardrobe<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I'm getting back in the saddle with a little thing I will be doing every Hump Day.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia;">Wednesday Words! (I'm sure this is already a thing, but it's new here!!)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia;">Basically I will go prompt hunting in the areas of different blogs and link them back here. I'm really excited to be writing again, even if I am a little rusty. This first prompt is brought to you from<span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"> </span><a href="http://www.helloneverland.com/blogging/write-on-july-blogging-prompts" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;">Hello Neverland</span></a> when she asked What are your Summer Wardrobe Staples?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Before we deployed I donated mostly everything in my closet and never looked back! It was a great feeling, to not have so much <b>stuff</b>. I will admit I'm not much of a fashionista or even a girly girl, but after 6 months of cammies and boots I'm ready for something different. I can't wait to get back to the states and hop into a pair of jeans or shorts- maybe even a sun dress?! Ahh, the possibilities seem endless! What makes me crave the freedom of civilian clothing even more? Seeing all the magazines and their websites talking about <u>Choosing <i>the perfect</i> Summer Party Dress</u>, <u><b>20</b> Beat the Heat party pieces under<b> $20</b></u> and <u>Summer <b>MUST-HAVES </b>for <i>your</i> closet</u> -- I turned and looked at my wardrobe and of course all my summer staples are vastly different being in Afghanistan - it made me homesick for cute flip flops and tank tops.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I hate feeling down in the dumps so I decided these are some pretty unique summer must-haves(BONUS: they're unisex so I'm totally hooked up with that whole boyfriend-fit trend- that's still going on right?). I present to you:</span><br />
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<u><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Summer Wardrobe Staples (in a combat zone)</span></u></h3>
<b><u>Daytime look:</u></b><br />
<b>Boot socks</b>- drop a little powder in these babies to keep wetness away...for a little while anyway<br />
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<b>FROG top and bottom</b>- FROG actually stands for Flame Resistant Organizational Gear. These are also thinner than regular cammies keeping you cooler- if only they'd make a FROG sports bra =/<br />
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<b>RAT Boots and boot bands</b>- Rugged All-Terrain boots are a little heavy, but they are definitely more comfortable than some of the boots I've been issued. Boot bands keep the bottom of your trousers closed over the top of your boots making sure no bugs get in- unfortunately these are also annoying.<br />
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<b>Watch</b>- when time is of the essence, you're gonna have to keep track of it. I wouldn't recommend spending too much money on this as a deployment will really put it through the wringer<br />
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<b>Flak</b>: IFAK, mag pouches, mags, ammo, TQ, drop pouch, carabiner(s)-<br />
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<b>Kevlar</b>- Yes, Kevlar is a type of material- this handy helmet is made out of it hence the clever name<br />
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<b>M4 (rifle)</b>- This and Water are tied for 1st place of essential accessories. Clean it, respect it and never ever lose it.<br />
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<b>Sunglasses</b>- ballistic eyewear is a must, you can either have the actual tinted lens or switch out for a clear lens. Being a photographer my work depends on my eyes being taken care of, so I usually chose the clear lens if I'm out and need protective eyewear, but I usually never walk outside without my sunglasses.<br />
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<b>Cover: 8 point or Boonie</b>- A cover is the Marine term for Hat. 8 points are usually what you think of when thinking of a Marine, the boonie cover is more of a wilderness look and actually offers better protection from the sun.<br />
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<b>Water-</b> Water is the most important accessory to have this summer, and it's great for your skin!<br />
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<b><u>Nighttime/Leisure Look:</u></b><br />
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<b>Green Skivvy Shirt- </b>a nice green cotton tee keeps you somewhat cool on hot Afghan nights<br />
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<b>Silkies- </b>or any type of super lightweight shorts to stay cool<br />
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<b>Shower Shoes- </b>Also known as flip flops. I started this deployment with a two-dollar pair from Old Navy, but they broke just about a month ago so now I have plain black ones that are bound to break any day now. These are essential in showering, a pair of these keep your feet off of the shower floor as well as the entire shower area. This is also the only time crocs are acceptable- and kind of even the pair of shower shoes that are sought after.<br />
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If you feel you're not really getting a sense of my totally cool outfit provided by Uncle Sam, I will be posting photos later, it's just hard to get photos up with the internet connection out here <br />
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Remember to stop by Hello Neverland's <a href="http://www.helloneverland.com/" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;">blog</span></a><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;">, she has great tips and prompts - I feel like I've stumbled upon buried treasure!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"><br /></span>FrancesJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10608576780465350242noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4733809394431662398.post-69094798899478442602014-05-12T21:00:00.003-07:002014-05-12T21:00:50.042-07:00Her Majesty<br />
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He dared not refuse the Queen, for her scorn seem to hold more fury and destruction than any battle he had been in, but more so the sight of her melted him from the inside out, her warm embrace welcomed him home and her soft voice held him captive. So his only answer was "As you wish," when she said "Daddy, let's have a tea party!"</div>
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I've been gone from this writing for so long I needed to get back into it. I wrote this super short story after looking for writing prompts and stumbling upon <a href="http://thesarcasticmuse.com/" target="_blank">The Sarcastic Muse</a> and finding some really great writing tips and then a TON of writing prompts on their tumblr. This immediately made me think of how The Sgt. would act if we have a little girl one day, I love watching the Princess Bride, so of course I had to put the obvious homage to it in there.</div>
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Writing this little piece had me really thinking about growing our family and who I hope my kids will be someday. At first I was obviously thinking about if I have a daughter how much I want her to just be happy and comfortable with herself, since I never was and how much I don't want her to take 20 plus years to find out who she is and fully embrace it. Then I thought "Well, I want that for ALL my kids, no matter their gender," which makes sense and I'm sure that's really all any parent wants for their kid(s). Naturally, the best way to shape them is to be the person you want them to be, so I've made a promise to myself, from now on I will:</div>
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<li>pray more and study His word a lot more</li>
<li>take time to read, write, take pictures or anything that brings me joy and relaxation.</li>
<li>STOP being negative with myself and comparing myself to others</li>
<li>give more praise than ridicule</li>
<li>accept compliments as they are</li>
<li>drink more tea</li>
<li>enjoy seeing myself in the mirror</li>
<li>never feel guilty about eating something and stop over indulging on junk</li>
<li>continue to be active</li>
<li>listen to my body when it needs rest</li>
<li>accept when I need help instead of pushing through in fear of looking weak</li>
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There's probably more I could do to improve on myself, but this is a good place to start. I just hope that I will set a good example for my little Monster and any more that come along.</div>
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The sarcastic muse prompts can be found <a href="http://thesarcasticmuse.tumblr.com/" target="_blank">here</a> and I definitely plan on using more to help me get back in the game :)</div>
FrancesJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10608576780465350242noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4733809394431662398.post-24265068098951362132012-12-28T16:40:00.000-08:002012-12-28T16:54:34.839-08:00Do your kids creep you out?<div>
The Monster has recently let his personality shine through and it's awesome, but sometimes he does little things that creep me out such as::</div>
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I wake up and the kid is just staring at me. Not one blink or even shutter of the eyelid. I tried not to notice how disturbing it was at first by rolling over and trying to go back to sleep but then the Monster climbs over my shoulder and sticks his nose in my ear. Let me tell you if you think heavy breathing behind you is weird try having it literally right in your ear hole. Sometimes I get lucky enough to get the cool sensation of drool running down the back of my ear and neck</div>
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As a Mom I always find myself wanting to clean his face- in particular- his nose! I really can't stand it when his tiny little nostrils are rimmed with crust or ooze. Or worse, that one little booger that didn't quite get cleaned off and every time he breathes just flails in and out of his nose like a Pentecostal on Sunday morning. Sometimes, I see it from across the room and if he see's me looking at him it's like he knows what I'm thinking and will stop whatever he's doing to shake his chubby little slobber and banana covered feeler at me in a "no-no!" motion. So to keep him on his toes I throw him for a loop and ask him if he wants a cookie which he always come running for, but he may just not want me to know I'm on to him.</div>
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More recently, though, he has taken his creeper status to a whole new level. </div>
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Expert: Creepster McCreeperson.</div>
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After a long day away from Dad, when we hear the keys outside the front door I always ask the Monster "Is that Daddy?" to which he replies with a GASP! *shocked face* runs over to be in view of the front entry way (if he's not already there) squats just a little bit and waits. Which is cute when the door opens because he starts running in place waving his arms frantically with an occasional clap and grunting "OO-OO-OO! DA! OO! ANUHNUHNA!" (we still haven't figured out why he shouts anuhnuh [banana] when he gets excited.) So why is this eery on a whole new level? Well because he has started to do this when no one is at the front door he'll even run over to the computer desk or the couch. Then, just when you think thats disturbing enough he does a slow turn all wide-eyed to look back at me straight in the pupils as if to say "I can hear them mommy dearest can you?!" Makes me coil back shaking my head and outwardly reply with "No, I don't hear them you adorable little lunatic!"</div>
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I recently posted about this on Facebook and had 14 people like the status and even had one friend comment "Thank god I'm not the only mom who thinks my kid talks to ghosts!!" I mean, I know I was a weird little kid but straight creeper like this? Must come from my husband or something. What weird or creepy thing do your kids do? Or did your parents ever tell you how weird you were when you were little?<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Probably about to share food with that dead girl who was poisoned in the 6th Sense </td></tr>
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FrancesJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10608576780465350242noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4733809394431662398.post-21757269664337503312012-12-18T15:50:00.001-08:002012-12-18T15:50:35.473-08:00where am I?!UGH! Seriously I feel like I don't know what's going on anymore<br />
I have been sick- constantly since about the end of September and I am just now feeling a little bit better.<br />
So to update you all here's what has gone on since I was last able to write::<br />
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Them monster turned ONE! seriously where did the time go? It's like he was just in his cool little tanning bed just yesterday and now he's grown so big and KEEPS GROWING! Someone stop the madness!<br />
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-sA6znxv_hhA/UNDsSeG7jDI/AAAAAAAAAK8/QZTNUaC60qU/s1600/bluebaby.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="148" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-sA6znxv_hhA/UNDsSeG7jDI/AAAAAAAAAK8/QZTNUaC60qU/s200/bluebaby.jpg" width="200" /></a><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-AWCEeSOfq84/UNDuLdZlaqI/AAAAAAAAALU/b_41wTz6OKo/s1600/IMG_0053.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; display: inline !important; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="149" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-AWCEeSOfq84/UNDuLdZlaqI/AAAAAAAAALU/b_41wTz6OKo/s200/IMG_0053.JPG" width="200" /></a>This little boy has done one incredible job of showing me what I was born to do. I kept trying to do a video for him on his birthday and yet all I could do was start crying, maybe I'll never get it done but I sure will try!</div>
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We came back in October and I went to San Francisco for a day to work the Marine Fleet Week's high school band challenge. It's a pretty cool event where Bay Area high schools get together and show off their best performances including their color guard. It was pretty fun and I got some pretty good video for the recruiting station up there. I was really impressed with all the performances and the city- seriously you guys got it good up north! </div>
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The rest of the month passed in a pretty big blur until I realized holy moley and a half it's halloween next week! The Mr had to work that night so it was just me and the monster- we were a circus act he was a dancing bear and I was the animal tamer- i didn't really get any pictures of me but I made darn sure I had the monster bear. We went to go visit Dad at work that night, the monster told him "I'll do the paperwork Dad, you can go out on patrol!" </div>
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November brought the 237th Birthday of my beloved Corps. The Sgt and I decided instead of going to his units Birthday Ball and mine too, we opted for the one with cheaper tickets- and even though I was bummed I didn't get to wear a dress to his we both had a great time. And just ten day later we celebrated our two-year anniversary. Sgt just couldn't wait to give me my present so we ended up exchanging gifts two days early- usually I'm a stickler for celebrating special dates on the actual date but after seeing my gift I definitely didn't mind! We spent a nice cozy and quiet thanksgiving together. I shared my slice of pumpkin pie with the monster- his very first slice and taste of cool whip! The month ended with us heading out to Julian for their annual christmas tree lighting- which unfortunately wasn't too spectacular and the best pictures of the night were of the monster feeding the Sgt.</div>
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During this whole time I was in and out of medical and going to appointment after appointment and having blood drawn, and then getting more blood and more blood drawn they finally decided the reason for my illness was probably my gallbladder seeing as I had cholestatis of pregnancy while the monster was still in my belly. Well they took a look at me and saw there was no blockage but there was a crap ton of stupid huge stones so they said hey you don't need that anyway and I was like "well I do need a faster run time why don't you take the appendix out too!" (just kidding no one will remove your insides just so you can run faster) I had surgery last week and they finally took it out and now I have four little incisions on my tummy held together and healing under some kind of gorilla glue. Thankfully my father-in-law came into town to help us with the monster while I heal and he helped us decorate the tree!</div>
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Honestly the end of the year has gone by so fast and I have a busy beginning to the new year! So wish me luck and I promise not to leave you guys hanging again!</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Kw-YBgoSyJU/UND9b8peDaI/AAAAAAAAAME/cMJccep_yes/s1600/Scan+123530000.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Kw-YBgoSyJU/UND9b8peDaI/AAAAAAAAAME/cMJccep_yes/s200/Scan+123530000.jpg" width="140" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">we look good for 237 years old eh?</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-7aoRqTwdAXU/UND9y3ml3dI/AAAAAAAAAMM/CzaqKaph3-g/s1600/IMG_0065.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="133" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-7aoRqTwdAXU/UND9y3ml3dI/AAAAAAAAAMM/CzaqKaph3-g/s200/IMG_0065.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">When we got married neither one of us had a lot of money and he bought me a smaller ring with just one stone, he hated it and I loved it- but I'm a very big fan of this one too ;) </td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-4hW3jBUMESw/UND-TwQlGTI/AAAAAAAAAMc/RRnTD7oxWMI/s1600/annigift.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-4hW3jBUMESw/UND-TwQlGTI/AAAAAAAAAMc/RRnTD7oxWMI/s200/annigift.jpg" width="148" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: left;">And his anniversary gift a new lid for riding- he's wearing it because it also has a bluetooth headset so he can answer the phone when he rides just by simply saying "Hello?" cool huh?!</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-EVAjZLpt2VM/UND-QepeIjI/AAAAAAAAAMU/yJe9vUP50B0/s1600/blurrybutcute.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-EVAjZLpt2VM/UND-QepeIjI/AAAAAAAAAMU/yJe9vUP50B0/s200/blurrybutcute.jpg" width="149" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">mmm PIE!! a bit blurry but forgive me it was taken with my phone</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-1OKKZ-Bw_aA/UND-poWZIHI/AAAAAAAAAM0/X6KlLLjk7NQ/s1600/IMG_0006.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="133" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-1OKKZ-Bw_aA/UND-poWZIHI/AAAAAAAAAM0/X6KlLLjk7NQ/s200/IMG_0006.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">kettle corn Dad?</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-mr3R3nvmZ6w/UND-kLxYGAI/AAAAAAAAAMs/K1GHM4Md_HA/s1600/IMG_0005.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="133" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-mr3R3nvmZ6w/UND-kLxYGAI/AAAAAAAAAMs/K1GHM4Md_HA/s200/IMG_0005.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Don't make any sudden movements I'm pretty sure I just saw Santa</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-ZvtmOu2j0EM/UND-W8YYgFI/AAAAAAAAAMk/W2gRnx3-Quc/s1600/gallbladder.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="148" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-ZvtmOu2j0EM/UND-W8YYgFI/AAAAAAAAAMk/W2gRnx3-Quc/s200/gallbladder.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">three in a line and one right under the belly button</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-IYaJsjXiVyI/UND-yd4xiDI/AAAAAAAAAM8/Xm6-6C4oqY8/s1600/IMG_0021.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-IYaJsjXiVyI/UND-yd4xiDI/AAAAAAAAAM8/Xm6-6C4oqY8/s200/IMG_0021.jpg" width="136" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Ok Papa a lil more to the left-that's it just a liiiiiittle more</td></tr>
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FrancesJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10608576780465350242noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4733809394431662398.post-81369134675050420942012-08-21T21:37:00.001-07:002012-08-21T21:41:51.122-07:00My bra & chonies match- isn't that enough?!I felt like I had a lot of it all put together. Working full time, being wife, being mom, and still finding time to go to the gym at least twice a week, and holy shit I put on a purple bra and just so happened to have pulled out some purple undies!<br />
Yet, the other day I felt like a bad mom, a bad wife and not really doing good at life in general. I am constantly tired so I go to bed early, and I get woken up in the middle of the night by a crying child and so I tend to oversleep. When I get "free" time I don't really feel like going out, I feel like putting on something comfy and reading (and catching up on) blogs, writing, <a href="http://www.facebook.com/SFJohnson303" target="_blank">facebooking</a>, <a href="https://twitter.com/beansNcornfed" target="_blank">tweeting</a> and/or <a href="http://pinterest.com/beansncornfed/" target="_blank">pinning</a>. I mean, is that so wrong? Hell, at least I walked out of the house with pants on in the morning and didn't cuss out or punch anyone (who I shouldn't have) at the end of the day, what more do people want from me?!!<br />
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But when the Sgt. said something to me that made me think, "Man where did <b><i>I</i></b> go?!" I, first of all, got all butt-hurt for about half a day. Then, I revamped my thinking. I made old goals/regimes new again and I thought of ways to get ME back, which is really hard when you got a little one who you want to devote all your time to ensuring he becomes an A+ Student/Popular/Well-adjusted/Class President/rock star/Olympian/astronaut/heroically good Samaritan. The number one thing that came to mind though was I enjoyed myself more when I made time for others and brought joy to them. Now don't get me wrong, bringing joy to my son is loads of awesome, but sometimes doing stuff for other people besides him is super rewarding too. Really, isn't that what life should be about? Helping others, enjoying others and doing what you can to put a better foot forward? So I'm making a better effort to get back in contact with those ones important to me and that keep me going (unknowingly) with their positive attitudes, and doing things for them in return and hopefully I'll find that happiness again that brought me renewed energy every day, and gave me the motivation to get through my week.<br />
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The Sgt. noticed he was in a rut too and so we've been pushing each other to get into the gym and re-working our schedules when we get home to not immediately veg out on the couch. We have been putting a bucket list of things to do in San Diego as a family or just as a couple before we get out of the Marine Corps and move to, well, actually we haven't figured that out yet, but we won't be here forever. The thing is sometimes with life, you get stuck. Unfortunately it can also creep up on you and you don't even know you're stuck, but the best thing to do is get up, shake the crap off of you and get going.<br />
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Does anyone else feel like they unknowingly get into a rut like I did with becoming a mom? How do you get yourself out of it? Is it personal journey or do you tell others and they keep you accountable?<br />
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Some incredible people (<a href="http://www.theaums.com/" target="_blank">Christine Candelaria</a>, <a href="http://www.afterthebubbly.com/" target="_blank">Lela Davidson</a>, <a href="http://www.strictlyfab.com/" target="_blank">Celena Gill</a>, <a href="http://www.bobbleheaddad.com/" target="_blank">Jim Higley</a> and <a href="http://www.dialmforminky.com/" target="_blank">Stephanie Dulli</a>) I know have some tips for getting their families moving and away from the every day blahs<br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://www.ivillage.com/how-remove-obstacles-keep-our-families-moving/6-h-481009">How to Remove Obstacles that Keep Our Families from Moving - iVillage </a></span></div>
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FrancesJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10608576780465350242noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4733809394431662398.post-34642053806663619012012-07-31T14:54:00.002-07:002012-07-31T14:54:38.374-07:00I'm Dying- I'm also a hypochondriac I don't like going to medical unless it's absolutely necessary- such as an annual check up because I always think I'm dying. I Goweki search (research/study via google Web MD and wikipedia) what's going on with me and I'm 100% convinced I'm in dire need of getting my will in order. <br />
Once I have found the sentence "COULD be an underlying _______ problem" I hear little me inside my head saying <br />
-<em>"Yup, you have an underlying liver and kidney problem, brace yourself for your next Dr appointment, and while you're at it go ahead and try making that triple layer cake you always said you would, finish the scrapbook you started, take more pictures of yourself having fun with your son so he won't forget you and tell your husband you love him, but if he moves on too soon you'll hang around to haunt him."-</em><br />
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For instance, when I was pregnant with my son I developed Cholestasis, which is a liver disease onset by pregnancy. The Internet said it could be an underlying liver problem. I shrugged it off considering the monster and I were perfectly healthy- except for him being about 5 and half weeks early and me having a fever during labor, we were great. So when a few months ago (after I stopped breast feeding and my body knew it wasn't supplying anything internally anymore for the boy) I started getting extremely sick when eating any kind of gluten, and if I had anything spicy or any kind of alcohol within a 24 hour period of eating bread and the like, well I could forget about retaining those nutrients! So I made an appointment which meant I had to make another appointment with the gastroentorologist to get my blood drawn- he also informed me I was slightly anemic- and then wait a month for my next appointment.<br />
So during that time, off I went on my little Goweki research party and found that celiac disease (which is the disease of being allergic to gluten thus having to alter your eating lifestyle) can also be caused by an underlying kidney problem. SO of course there it was in plain sight. In a very stretched-over-analytical-worrisome plain sight, I had underlying diseases laying dormant in my body for so long and were just then coming to take over my body and take my life from me. It was a horrible couple of weeks.<br />
I finally get back to the hospital, where the doctor seemed too busy to see me and said all my blood and liver levels were just fine, and I probably had heartburn. He then received a call and when he was done asked if I had any questions, when I said no he showed me the direction from which I came and he was gone. I was fine, I was going to live...but that's according to this man.<br />
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I don't trust 'em! Any of em!!<br />FrancesJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10608576780465350242noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4733809394431662398.post-81823567912180517162012-07-05T12:21:00.001-07:002012-07-05T12:22:20.303-07:00No longer Heads or TailsI have used the trusty coin flip to make some pretty major life decisions. I use it to help me make the decision I really want to make, you know, if it lands on heads and I didnt really want heads I knew tails was the way to go the whole time and vice versa. For example, when I was going through college I just couldn't do it anymore and told my self on the way to class one day as I pulled a quarter out of my pocket "Heads, I join the Marine Corps. Tails, I stick with college and home and see where it goes." Well, one look of the honorable Mr. George Washington and 5 1/2 years later here I am, a sergeant of Marines and pretty happy about it. However, I don't think that's going to work now.<br />
I'm coming to a fork in my career path in which I must make a pretty big decision again, but it's too big to make with the flip of a coin this time, especially since I have two major componants in my life that are deciding factors of every decison I make. The Sgt and The Boy. Should I ask for orders up north where I have a bigger chance of FINALLY being deployed? Or do as I ask to just go down the road where the opportunity is still there but not as great? <br />
Before The Boy came along I had never deployed, but always wanted to and tried every chance I could while stationed over seas, now that he's here all I want to do is hang out with him and wacth him grow and learn and not miss a single moment of his life. Hell, just four months before he was born I re-enlisted with a happy heart- thinking I wouldn't be changing my mind about wanting to deploy. The minute they put him in my arms though, I was done. I was madly in love with someone I JUST met and all I could think about was how I would never leave him- crap, I just signed up for four more years of people in higher positions than me telling me where I will be going.<br />
Then there's the Sgt. This man has vowed to stick by my side and support me in whatever endevor I choose, but he might be getting out and going into a job that will take him away from us for a good amount of time before we can really settle down and my decision of where I go will affect our family life and goals we sat down and talked about months ago. Do I try to stick as close as possible or just throw caution to the wind and go up north and hope things just work out?!<br />
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I'm not just myself anymore. I'm a wife in a young marriage still trying to get use to each other and see what works for us. I'm a mom to a nine-month-old and it's kind of a full time gig. I'm like a grown-up now and I have a bunch of crap to consider before making choices, I think I'll just go take a nap.FrancesJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10608576780465350242noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4733809394431662398.post-31993507604949152412012-06-18T21:15:00.000-07:002012-06-18T21:15:17.586-07:00The one that got away<br />
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I'm a mom, I get frazzled. I'm human, I get frustrated. </div>
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I start by saying those because over the weekend I realized a couple things. One, as my monster was sitting on the floor crying I started thinking "Man, it'd be great if you'd just stop crying." That's when he started crawling toward me and then hugged my legs and lifting his arms up motioning for me to pick him up. So with him be just undeniably adorable I bent over picked him up and wiped away his tears, and just like that he was over it smiling and clapping. </div>
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Now to understand what made me feel like a complete a-hole about this I have to tell you about me, the me I was in 2008. I had come into the Marine Corps just a year prior and had a boyfriend, not the kind that wanted to know my family, and kind of not really the kind I wanted my famly to know. But alas, we were together for the wrong reasons and I ended up pregnant. When the Dr. told me I was indeed pregnant, I was scared but I was pretty happy too. So I accepted the fact that I was going to have a baby, and kept checking all the online baby calenders to learn about my new one's progress. A couple weeks later, while in the middle of class, I started getting really bad cramps went to the bathroom, if you have no idea where this is going I'll just say I was definitely bleeding. I finished class and then went to our detachment Sr. Enlisted Advisor who then had another Marine take me to the ER. The ER Dr couldn't confirm it since it was early on in the pregnancy and said the test didn't say if the cell count was going up or going down so I would need to wait a week and go back for tests. I didn't <em>need</em> to go back to know what I already knew. I lost the baby. I spent the entire next day either sleeping or crying.</div>
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At my follow up appointment the next week, the doctor took me into a small room and said "I don't know why they made you come back, you're not pregnant. And if you were you are not pregnant any more." Then she hurried me out of her office and went back to the waiting room packed full of patients...just like that completely dismissed as a single active duty female who was probably just too dumb and miscounted her cycle. What that doctor didn't know was, I wasn't some dumb floozy who got knocked up and would have been relieved by the news I wasn't pregnant. I wanted more than anything to be a mom.</div>
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I'll be honest that was one of the two things that made me kind of forget myself. Forget who I was and where I cam from. I became selfish, moody and honestly- a total bitch. I could go into everything I felt in those following days, months and years, but I digress. Those weeks I told myself I would welcome the cries and messiness of evrything that a baby brings when I finally did have a kid. </div>
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And when the monster came up to me crying like I was never going to come back and just wanting nothing more than to be in my arms and I got frustrated- I stopped. I remembered what it was like when the first one got away and I leaned over picked him up and hugged him, told him I loved him and even though he didn't know I was frustrated I told him I was sorry kissed away his tears and boom he was all better.</div>
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And two, yeah I'll admit, there was time a while ago when I said "I just want someone to want me and need me desperately (and it wouldn't hurt if he was just out-of-this-world-cute)" and as my little monster of a son came crawling up to me crying because he wanted to be near me I thought to myself, I definitely got what I wished for.<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-GCk03NZXaIo/T91E1EKlqaI/AAAAAAAAAGw/dwLhIB4SLmc/s1600/Photo+on+6-16-12+at+7.41+PM+%232.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-GCk03NZXaIo/T91E1EKlqaI/AAAAAAAAAGw/dwLhIB4SLmc/s320/Photo+on+6-16-12+at+7.41+PM+%232.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<br /></div>FrancesJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10608576780465350242noreply@blogger.com0